After my last rant(post) I thought it might not hurt, to share some deeper thoughts on the entire matter of people and what they do in real life and social media. I believe my last post clearly demonstrated, even though it was a bit of a rant, that people do the same thing in both RL and on social websites. What I did not bother with, is the why. Why they do these things, why we react the way we do, whether publically or in private, and why any of it even matters to the average person.
So let’s start with that first why. Why do people do the things they do?
The easy answer is people are people. However, I am not known as someone who gives the easy answer. People are people. What does that mean? It means people are flawed. There are far too many ways to explain them all. People make mistakes. People hide truths that are unflattering. People want to survive. People become numb. People don’t really know how to listen. There are really more things wrong with the average person, than are right.
How we became so fucked up as a species, I will leave this answer to those “experts” out there. However, I don’t believe there is an easy answer to this question. Environmental issues, genes, social ideology, etc. can all come into play. The how we got here, is not really as important, at least for the sake of this article. We are answering those why questions right now.
Why do we react the way we do?
I believe this is because of two main factors. One is we just don’t know how to react in any other way. I know better and how I should react, however, I am also the kind of person that would rather put it “out there” than just “ keep it bottled up inside”. While I know most people won’t read the post, I also know that not everything I write, is actually for the readers. Sometimes I just write to get the words out of my head.
The second reason we react the way we do is because of bad expectations. We all have them and literaly everyone is to blame. We are told to be positive. We are shown on TV and in the movies, that everything ends happily ever after. We read this crap in our books, magazines, newspapers. It is everywhere.
Why are we not taught reality? Understanding that all people are completely flawed, would go so much further in creating realistic expectations. Yet, we are told over and over again, fables. Falsehoods of what people and life is really like. True friends never abandon you. Love is stronger than anything. Love lasts forever. Trust in the better angels of human nature. It just goes on and on and on. It is people lying about people. Lies designed and honed over centuries, to keep the monsters in the closet. All the while we shield ourselves, and are blind to any real threats, such as ourselves, our neighbors, our friends, and finally our family.
Our expectations, that have been pounded into our minds since childhood, do nothing, but endanger us and lead us blindly toward the real threats of our lives. Those erroneous expectations will never benefit us.
So why does this matter to the average person? This answer is simple and yet, complicated too. When we walk around with these unrealistic expectations of others, and those expectations are not realized, we sink far lower than we would have, had we had realistic expectations. Is it not better to see the wall before we run into it? Of course it is. Therefore, throw away any expectations! Realize this now…you cannot control the without, you can only control the within. You should never expect anything, from anything, you don’t control. It is just basic common sense.
While it is my practice of airing out my disappointment in things, I wanted you to be aware, that I know I am ultimately responsible for my happiness. I chose to declare my feelings on the matter, not in any attempt to change things. I was merely letting others know, of why I decided to avoid social media.
I have no expectations. I only have lost dreams and hopes, as everyone else. Perhaps one day, a hope we all share, will come to fruition and we can again have expectations and those expectations will be correct. I hope this helps others out there and have an amazing day!