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I want to tell you something. I want to type something with meaning and importance. But I cannot and never will. I am the man screaming in the wilderness. I am the the man without a voice. I am the man tortured by his own soul.

I used to believe I would post something that would change people’s lives. Yet, I’ve discovered nobody really wants to change, let alone have someone tell them the way. I used to believe we all have a chance to make a difference. I was grossly mislead in this thinking. It takes money and power to make a difference. Without those, you are just another Joe smuck, who nobody respects or listens to. I used to believe that we should never give up fighting the good fight. Now I know there is no good left to fight for. Go ahead and try to think of anything that is completely good left in this world. If you really think about it, you will find this task much harder than it seems. I used to think we were all put here with a purpose. While I cannot state for sure that there is no purpose, I can say our purpose may be no greater than that of garbage. Placed upon this planet to decay and disintegrate.

Sadly, I must take credit for actually believing any of these stupid things but in my defense the world taught these things before it taught me the truth. It is like when we were young, we are told about Santa Claus, or the Tooth Fairie, the Easter Bunny, Love, Friendship, or even God. We are told all these lies and then as we grew older we are told or shown the truth of these things. Society and families fill us with lies, and then release us into a world, that is completely the opposite of everything they told us. I suppose they figured if we were told the truth from the beginning, then we would quickly figure out there is no reason to remain here. They were too weak to speak it and too scared of being left alone in this horrific world.

In a way, I can see how this might seem like the only option. After all, I did the same thing to my kids. I did not tell them that Santa Claus was really the devil. I did not tell them that there are no fairies. I did not say that the Easter Bunny was created to hide the death of Jesus. I did not explain to them that true friendship does not exist outside of fairy tales and movies. I never stated that love dies. I never told them that life is a one-way trip. I never explained that trusting anyone was more foolish than shaving your privates with a straight razor. I failed as a parent. I could not bring myself to take away the magic.

Today, in a way, I wish that I had. I wish so because, I feel that if I had done so then one day, they would not have to face this day. The day when you realize all that you have lived for, stood for, and strove for, was lies. Unfortunately, they too will have to face this day and once their disillusions have been shattered, they will have to decide what is next. Too bad there is no real next. Only the shame of what we are.

I have now typed 579 words yet none of them matter. I could say things I think that might matter, such as, I love my wife and would give anything to spend as much time with her as I can. I love my boys and would do anything for them, even kill. I love the human race and wish with all my heart that we would evolve and become all we have potential to be. I love animals and wish we had enough insight to treat them better, for they are certainly more noble than us. I love the imagination of mankind; I only wish we could decide to use this great power for creation rather than destruction. I could say these and many more meaningful things but it does not matter. It does not matter now or ever because the words spill forth from my mind. If the words were from someone with power and fame, they might actually make a difference for a few days. Even then though, they would become like dust in the wind.

For our society and all its progress, has failed to work on the one thing that matters…us. We have devolved. We’ve sunk down to screaming into a virtual reality called the Internet. We all scream for attention. We want to be noticed. We want to be seen. We want to be known. But we have never really gotten that it is only through helping others that we will be noticed. It is only through giving our time will we be seen. It is only through giving of ourselves that we will be known. However, the darkness of this, is that even in doing so, we may remain unseen, unheard, and unknown. This is simply because too many are too lazy to do the things required to make themselves noticed. In spending all our time this way, none can be noticed, seen, or heard. You cannot notice, see, or hear anyone else, if you are too busy trying to become seen, heard, or noticed.

When one finally sees the situation of mankind, then the word “hope” just becomes another word without meaning. Without meaning, nothing matters and nothing you do ever will. One day, as all things pass, so to shall humanity. That is the final conclusion anyone with a mind will come to see. We are not heading down a path of evolution. We are going down the path of destruction and this path will not change. In order for our path to change…we must change. That will never happen. Too many are content with the status quo. The rich are happy as long as they can continue to make more money they cannot take with them. The poor are happy because the government takes care of them. The middle class are just too tired to care what happens.

Science has proven that the more intelligent a person is, the less likely they will find any kind of happiness. I, for one, can vouch for the accuracy of this statement. I could not find happiness if you gave me a map, GPS, and a personal guide. The more you learn and understand about this world and its inhabitants, the more you just want to shoot, anyone and everyone, responsible for the disaster we call Earth. We were supposed to leave this world a better place for our children, yet we have sat around and in our passivity, let the planet become a nightmare for our children. If there is an afterlife, we should ALL fear it. Undoubtedly, we will each have to pay for our part in creating this monstrous world. Even those who did nothing still took part in letting it happen. We are all as guilty as the Germans who let the concentration camps happen. By not trying to stop bad, we are participating in its agenda through our non-interference.

Until we become active in changing things, we can sweep that word “hope” under the carpet. It has no place in a world filled with people too timid and fearful of change.

I have now typed over 1200 words but did any of it matter. I’d bet every cent I have that the answer is “NO”. Nothing I have ever typed in the past has, why should this be any different? Very few will take the time to read this, and of those that do, none will share. Because sharing an important message about changing our world for the better…is just too much effort. Even if one of two did, it still will not matter because like every word ever spoken, they will die on the vine. The reason for this is quite evident to anyone with the ability to think. The world is asleep. It will remain so. The world will never wake up. It will die asleep. Living in dreams is always going to be preferred to facing the reality of our existence. The world will die asleep and I fear I will be awake to see it.

I shall go back to my nightmares. There is nothing more I can do.